I just finished reading "Choosing to SEE: A Journey of Struggle and Hope" by Mary Beth Chapman, wife of Steven Curtis Chapman. It was about the loss of their five-year-old daughter. She was tragically killed when her older brother ran over her in their driveway. After reading her book, I know there is no way I could write a book. She did such a wonderful job expressing her feelings.....things I feel/have felt too. Can I quote part of her book here and pretend they're my own words?
"It might on certain days be buried deep down in my heart and have a hard time computing to my brain, but here is what I know and what I choose to believe, over and over again. I know God loves me and my family. I know God is sovereign and He knows what is best for us. I know He has our days numbered and makes no mistakes. I know that He will bring beauty from ashes...that is what I cling to in order to make it through another twenty-four hours."
There are days when I do pretty well, and then there are days when I find myself wiping the tears away most of the day. It's then that I have to "choose to believe" like Mary Beth said.